Rollercoasters, ramblings and rainbows

Sometimes, if I can’t share everything, I don’t want to share anything at all.

Hence the gap in posts — public ones at least — this last week or so.

You see, as much as I would have loved 50 or more people taking a poll on What-Should-Wendy-Do-With-Her-Life, I had to do this one on my own.

I’m leaving my job. And taking another one.

It was an absolutely easy decision in the end. Stress, frustration(s), pretty much being on-call 24 hours a day and no possibility for money or advancements as well as a lot of recent events made this decision so much easier than I ever thought it would be. I refuse to go into details about any work — my old job or my new job — in a public forum, so there’s not much more to say. My career as a journalist was a fantastic one that taught me a lot about the person I am and the world in which I live. But it just wasn’t the fairy-tale job I thought it was after my first journalism class my sophomore year of high school. I am disillusioned.

My new job should be really exciting. The only thing that would be better might possibly be being a stay-at-home mom, but even that might get a little old after a while. I’ll be spending more time away from home in a totally different field, but I have fallen in love with the team atmosphere at this place, the surroundings, the quick commute and well, yes, the (huge!) increase in pay and significant loss of stress. Not to mention that while there will be many hard days in this new position, I get to leave it at work and make home just home. I really expect that my family will benefit from this change as well in the long run.

I’m so excited.

But it’s hard to move past something you love, which is why I had to do this in my head and in quiet moments away from the computer and even away from my friends and family.

I’m confident I’ve made the right decision.

(Plus, no more laptops, notebooks, scanners, cameras and business cards floating around the dining room!)

It will be hard — really hard — to leave The Duders for a 10-hour block of window at a time, but I am so content knowing that the time I do get with him and Scott will be a stress-free, happy, cheerful, ready-to-play, ready-to-love Me. Not that witch that’s been hangin’ around lately. Oy, she’s annoying.

We’ve also been really busy this past week or so.

After Nicole’s fantastic visit, I had a Mommy-Baby Playdate with Hailey and her Mommy, Owen and his Mommy and even a new friend!

Then, Cousin Dan and his amazing girlfriend Dorothy did a quick visit and went skiing with Scott. I just loved seeing the two of them in their special moments, their special world that is just so beautiful to watch.

A visit from Zack’s Great Aunt Janet and Great Uncle Leon completed our recent doorbell ringings. I love having so many of Scott’s family around us.

And I would be remiss to not mention another special date — what would have been my Mom’s birthday. She was a Leap Year baby, so somewhere between Feb. 28 and March 1 this year I felt a profound loss and a deep love all at once. My one friend Krystal and I have bonded over our membership in the Motherless Daughters Club lately, a club whose membership is especially painful once you’re a mother yourself. It’s nice to know that someone really understands.

I celebrated my mother and her life the way I always do each year — in the kitchen. This time, it was cupcakes in our favorite colors — yellow and purple. Good therapy and yummy, too!

(As I type this, ‘The Rose’ is playing on my cheesy Sunday afternoon choice of music — Sirius Love. Makes me think of Mommy every time.)

And now, I’m enjoying the last few hours of a busy weekend.

My hunky hubby has a fire going in the fireplace, the baby is quieting down and snuggles are in my future!

It’s going to be an emotional week, I’m sure — my last five days as a reporter. But I also know that all of that messy garbage weighing down my shoulders will likely be gone with the closing of some files, the flipping of a cover on a notebook, the quiet leaving of some items on my desk in the office.

Memories to be added to yet another chapter in this beautiful life so far.

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3 thoughts on “Rollercoasters, ramblings and rainbows

  1. Major decisions are hard to make, but the peace you feel after you make a good one is amazing. I can tell that you have that peace. Enjoy these last few days and be excited for a change!
    Hope all is well and I’d love for our little men to meet one day!

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  2. I am so proud of you again…this time for your decision to move on. Sometimes that is so hard to do; it’s hard to let go of something you think you should hold on to but not sure why. And again, you will do well as you have with all your life challenges from your school decisions to eating disorders to embracing the gift of Zack. I wish I were more like you at your age even at this age. You my dear niece have taught me a thing or two about the important things in life. Love you more….Choch.

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  3. So exciting….starting a new chapter in life, especially when you know the decision to move on will result in a happier mommy and wife. Please know that our office will miss seeing you every Tuesday. I understand that you really won’t be that far away from us so please feel free to stop in anytime just to say hi. Good luck in your new adventure.

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